When I started thinking about what I want to write, I realized I did not have a story to tell or an experience to share … it’s more of reflection and insight. I thought about how many things I’ve learned since I am here and how much I have changed (in thinking, in attitude, in aims and aspirations) and also how many parts of the old me I have lost. One of the recent achievements would be the degree I earned last winter (one that I can put next to my name, but not yet in my ID :P), in addition to all knowledge and skills I acquired in the area I specialized for, all the people around the world I am connected to and the beautiful lifelong friendships we built. In the same time I feel like losing more and more of my connections back home, to the people I dreamed of changing the world with, to the places I once thought would be my home and to the aims and aspirations I came to Kassel with four years ago.
Here I found people I can work with but not yet found the environment that gives me the necessary inspiration and motivation to really succeed in what I am good at. I learned that my current main job is not my dream job, but that I find from time to time jobs I dreamed of doing. I learned that internationalization and international mobility might be good for the system but I don’t like to have people leaving all the time. I learned that sometimes we can’t change everything around us, and then we need to change something inside us.
I did not learn though how to work in a factory, how to obey, how to take a destructive feedback and how to lower my expectations (on me and on the others).
And I also learned that you need to be very careful what you wish for, because it becomes reality!
I see you!